One of my first clients just informed me that she has a brain tumor. I don't know how worried to be yet. She will almost certainly be having surgery to remove it, but I don't know much detail. The good news is that it is an answer to the question of why she's been suffering from eye pain for a long time.
Still, it is another reminder of the ephemeral nature of life.
I've had a few too many reminders of this sort lately.
Last spring, one of my Mother's first cousins died of cancer. I'm still sorry that I didn't go to her funeral, though that would have meant flying across the country.
In early July, Matt's Great Aunt Carolyn died. Loosing her was like loosing a grandparent again (I have none left). The following Monday (July 9), I had to go get her cat (Cally). I hadn't really felt her loss yet, but when I saw the sign on her door "My Cat Cally lives here, do not leave door open" I completely broke down. I sat there crying in her room, surrounded by all the things I'd helped Matt's parents move in for her. Cally was very upset and hid from me, but I took her home.
One week later, one of my clients died of a heart attack at age 54. His wife asked me to feed their cat while she rushed straight from work to the hospital. I got the news that he was dead just after arriving at his house. I had to tell another cat that she'd lost a human...
It was all too much for me... and it didn't stop there...
In the fall, I started this blog because I was trying to figure out how to get a very old friend's e-mail address. I wanted to e-mail her because I read on her blog that she had lost her best friend (who I had also known). I was hoping that since she had a blogger blog, if I did too, maybe Blogger would let me see her address. That was silly and didn't work, but I did find another way to e-mail her.
Why haven't I mentioned all this before? Perhaps because it affected me too deeply. I'm trying to focus on all the things I want to do in life. I love gardening, I love my cats, and I love drumming. I want to change the world.
I can do a lot, but I can't bring any of them back.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
We should talk. I have a student whose mother has cancer. We talked to his dad at parent-teacher conferences about how he is very resistant to being corrected in class. He broke down when his father brought this up to him and said that when he does what his parents or teachers say, it means they won and he lost.
So what does that mean when his mom is having a particularly low day? Does that mean he's losing that fight too?
Wow, I wonder what gave him the idea that making a mistake, accepting correction, or doing what someone else asks amounts to losing...
Does he act like he feels responsible for how his mother is doing?
Post a Comment